Making the ‘exchange’: the sweater returns

Yes, that infamous sweater that Brandon has been blogging and about for the past few weeks has been returned to its creator. And as our colleague Susan Rosinski says, “It’s about time the good guys won.”

But the sweater didn’t get returned until I went through what was, by far, the weirdest afternoon that I have experienced during my brief tenure with University News.

It all started as Bob and I were returning from a luncheon Friday afternoon. He received a voice mail from an official within the Institute, who wishes to remain anonymous, saying that the sweater was returned. Because I cover Student Affairs and because Bob, like all good bosses, has mastered the art of delegating, I was asked to return the call.

After contacting the official, I learned that someone, acting as a third-party, had turned over the sweater. The individual (who I shall now refer to as the informant) had agreed to return the sweater on behalf of those who had originally taken it. Because it was suggested by Dr. Simone on the Ask President Simone Web site that the individual responsible simply turn the sweater into the lost and found, amnesty was granted to the informant.

That’s where I come in.

I was asked if I, on behalf of University News, could take custody of the sweater and ensure that it was returned to Stevie Hegge, who made it. This would effectively take the situation out of the hands of any organization or person with any disciplinary authority (trust me, I don’t have the power to suspend my own dog).

The official was eager to have the sweater, which was being kept inside of a black trash bag, removed from their office. We agreed to meet outside the Wallace Library to “make the exchange.”

And then I lost it.

It sounded as if I was making some sort of drug deal that you’d see in the movies. I began laughing heartily on the phone, prompting the official to do the same.

So, I ventured over to the library with Mike and Susan (who were more interested in a cookie from Java Wally’s than the sweater) to meet the official. After spotting the official holding the trash bag, I couldn’t help but ask, “You got the stuff?”

After taking custody of the sweater, the official introduced me to an acquaintance—someone who had no idea what was really going on. The acquaintance, spotting the black bag, quipped, “What, is this the drop off point? You better make sure there are unmarked bills in there!”

And then I lost it…again.

Thus ended the great sweater mystery. But not before grabbing a cookie at Java Wally’s, of course.

For more on the return of the sweater, and future plans for it, keep an eye out for an upcoming post from Brandon.